Why Are Conversations About Mental Health Still Taboo? (Spoiler: Our Toxic Positivity)
Why Are Conversations About Mental Health Still Taboo? (Spoiler: Our Toxic Positivity) #
The silence is deafening. In a nation that thrives on the roar of mamak chatter, the blare of political rallies, and the relentless buzz of social media, one crucial conversation remains stubbornly, dangerously hushed: Mental Health. We’ll dissect the price of ikan kembong, debate teh tarik sweetness levels for hours, and loudly lament physical ailments. But mention anxiety, depression, burnout, or grief that lingers? Watch the air turn icy. Witness the awkward shuffle, the averted gaze, the swift change of subject. Malaysia, we are masters of the Great Mental Health Shutdown, and this collective denial isn’t just ignorant; it’s killing us softly.
Why? Why, in 2024, is acknowledging psychological struggle still met with the same discomfort as finding hair in your nasi lemak? The arsenal of dismissal is depressingly familiar:
- “Alah, semua orang ada masalah! Kamu kuat lah sikit!” (“Everyone has problems! Be strong!”) – The toxic positivity brigade. Suffering isn’t a competition, and dismissing someone’s pain with a demand for stoicism is cruelty disguised as motivation. It tells people their valid struggles are simply weakness, a personal failing of resilience. Would you tell someone with a broken leg to just “walk it off”?
- “Dia tu kurang iman / kurang sembahyang.” (“They lack faith / don’t pray enough.”) – Weaponizing religion. Reducing complex psychological conditions to a simplistic deficit of piety is not only inaccurate but profoundly damaging. It shames sufferers and implies their pain is a divine punishment, pushing them further from potential support. Faith can be part of healing, but it is not the sole cure for neurochemical imbalances or trauma.
- “Jangan nak cari perhatian.” (“Don’t seek attention.”) – The cynicism shield. Expressing distress is instantly pathologized as manipulation or attention-seeking, shutting down vulnerability before it can even breathe. This breeds terrifying isolation, forcing people to suffer silently for fear of being labelled “drama queens.”
- “Nanti kena masuk hospital gila.” (“They might get sent to the mental hospital.”) – The stigma sledgehammer. The deep-seated, irrational fear equating any mental health struggle with “craziness” or dangerous instability. It perpetuates myths, fuels discrimination in workplaces and communities, and deters people from seeking professional help until they reach absolute crisis point. We treat psychiatric care like a leper colony.
- “Bincang pasal ni buat aku tak selesa.” (“Talking about this makes me uncomfortable.”) – The ultimate selfishness. Prioritizing one’s own fleeting discomfort over another person’s desperate need for understanding and support. This is the root of the silence: an unwillingness to sit with discomfort, to listen without judgment, to bear witness to pain that isn’t easily fixed with kopi or roti.
The cost of this silence is measured in shattered lives. Talented individuals burn out and quit careers because admitting overwhelm is career suicide. Bright students see grades plummet, crushed by untreated anxiety, too afraid to seek help. Marriages fracture under the weight of undiagnosed depression. Parents struggle in isolation, terrified of being judged “bad” for feeling overwhelmed. Suicide rates whisper the horrifying truth we refuse to hear out loud. We lose friends, family, colleagues – not to some unavoidable tragedy, but to treatable conditions drowned in our collective shame and silence.
This taboo isn’t just ignorance; it’s institutionalized neglect. Mental health services are chronically underfunded and inaccessible. Workplace policies often pay lip service to “wellbeing” while penalizing anyone needing time off for therapy or burnout. Schools lack proper resources and trained counselors. Insurance coverage is frequently inadequate or non-existent. We create a system where seeking help is stigmatized and logistically nightmarish.
Enough with the toxic positivity platitudes and the wilful ignorance. A broken mind deserves the same care, respect, and urgency as a broken bone. Stop equating strength with silence. Stop weaponizing faith. Stop prioritizing your discomfort over someone else’s survival.
We need to normalize the conversation. Talk about therapy like you talk about physiotherapy. Share experiences (without judgment) when safe. Ask “How are you really?” and mean it. Challenge dismissive language. Demand better resources and policies. Support, don’t shame, those brave enough to say, “I’m not okay.”
Continuing this suffocating silence isn’t “traditional” or “strong”; it’s collective malpractice. Our relentless “geng-geng” culture means nothing if we abandon our own when their minds are hurting. Break the taboo. Speak up. Listen without fear. That life you save might be your neighbour’s, your colleague’s, your child’s… or even your own. The silence isn’t golden; it’s deadly. Let’s make some necessary noise.