The Double-Parkers Who Believe the World Revolves Around Them

Ah yes, the kings and queens of selfishness: double-parkers. These modern-day road tyrants leave their cars smack in the middle of traffic, handbrake up, hazard lights blinking like Christmas decorations, and then vanish into the sunset — or more accurately, into the nearest kopitiam for a leisurely half-hour teh tarik. To them, hazard lights are not a warning; they’re a royal decree: “I’ll be five minutes.” Newsflash: five minutes in Malaysian Standard Time translates to one ice kacang, two cigarettes, and a chat with an old school friend.

The logic is breathtaking: instead of finding proper parking, just block everyone else and call it a day. After all, why inconvenience themselves when they can inconvenience the world? They must think the road was built to personally serve their Honda City.

And heaven forbid you honk. To double-parkers, honking is an insult to their entire family tree. They’ll shuffle out reluctantly, throw you a dirty look, and wave dismissively as though you were the problem. No apology, no remorse. Just entitlement on four wheels.

We Malaysians tolerate it because confrontation isn’t in our DNA — but perhaps it’s time to change. Parking lots weren’t built for decoration. And hazard lights weren’t made to excuse bad manners.